When I played MTG as a kid, I had a thing for Sandbar Crocodile. I was (and still am) a sucker for big monsters, and the idea of the phasing mechanic–having creatures periodically appear and disappear–seemed cool conceptually. I didn’t realize then how bad it was to only be able to use your cards half the time.

As far as our theme here is concerned though, the old SC’s size is the first strike against it. We’ve already discussed the problems of megafauna, and just based on the picture, SC falls well within that category.

Second, it appears to be fairly well disguised; the flavor text indicates that it could easily be mistaken for a sandbar. A crocodile with camouflage definitely counts as strike two.

Which brings us back to that phasing. The rules text for phasing reads, “While [the card with phasing is] phased out, it’s treated as though it doesn’t exist.” Now, the possible interpretations of how a game mechanic manifests in reality is up for debate, but imagine a crocodile isn’t there one minute and is the next. It could pop up anywhere. Directly in front of your boat. Inside your house. Around you. I want no part of that. Strike three, Sandbar Crocodile. You’re out.

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