Reason #1,878: What in the world is a Jokulhaups?

You know what question I don’t have to ask, though: is a Jokulhaups a bad thing? Because you know what? It is bad. Look at the picture. Read the flavor text. Do you want to be standing in front of that mess? Do you want to be in the Yavimaya Valley when a Jokulhaups comes …

Reason #9,064: Sorry, rabbit. You were born in the wrong multiverse.

This is a cottontail rabbit, native to the Americas. Looks pretty normal. Seems healthy, no visible wounds or obvious illnesses. Doesn’t look malnourished. I think we can agree this rabbit is probably doing well enough for a rabbit, right? This is a rabbit from the MTG Multiverse plane of Dominaria. This rabbit has opposable digits. …

Reason #6,641: So much for crab legs

I have a cousin who loves crab legs. I think I might have had them for the first time with her. She’d be very disappointed with the MTG Multiverse, because apparently the crab legs here are really bad. And that’s only if you can get past the chitin at all, which sounds like a giant …

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