Ravnica. Listen. You have a problem here. There are terrors and nightmares in your sewers. Is that a squid? Why are we even still talking about your sewers? Get your act together, Ravnica! Come on!
Hey! You! Stop that. You stay in there! Don’t you come out; stay down there. Nope. NOPE! NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE!
But did you listen? No. “Let’s go on a quest,” you said. “Let’s have an adventure,” you said. “It will be fun.” Well, guess what. You found this. In the woods. Where you went, where I told you not to go. This one’s on you. I wash my hands of this.
If you go down in the woods today, you’re in for a big surprise. If you go down in the woods today, the moss will melt off your flesh.
It’s a treefolk assassin. Why do treefolk become assassins? NOPE. Just NOPE. Skipping this plane too. Don’t need trees murdering me in my sleep.
Does anyone else notice the eyes in there? Or the teeth? Or the howling? No? Just me? Okay, that’s cool. Y’all go on in. Have fun. I’m just gonna be somewhere else. Like maybe a different multiverse.
Goblin, you’re kinda putrid. I mean, no offense. It’s right there in your name, though. But this is not a serious problem. We can fix this. How about we start with a bath? And maybe get you some clothes that aren’t…rotting? Here, just…wait. Dude, wait, come back! No, that’s not what I meant by take …