Reason #4,056: The people here are scary too.

On Eldraine, it’s not just the monsters you have to worry about. Here’s a guy suplexing a bear. Also, that bear’s head cracked that rock, not the other way around. Also, that guy looks like he’s wearing plate; I don’t think plate is supposed to bend like that. Are these things normal? Should I not …

Reason #4,988: You’re going to have to release the chaos yourself.

Appears this guy has really gone all in on this reckless thing. Unfortunately for him, I can’t say I’m on board with that. Just doesn’t seem like a great idea. Then again, he probably doesn’t care much. I’m a human, not a goblin.

Reason #7,527: They call it human.

But I’m skeptical. Unless you’re hiding some unnaturally small people with unnaturally big hands inside that cloak, that’s a lot of hands there for just one person. Even if you had the right number of hands though, I still wouldn’t take that apple.

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