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Reason #8,894: The Rakdos cult is full of evil, evil people.

I suppose one could debate what a rusalka is, and that could change how one interprets this situation. Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe they’re closer to the malevolent, nature spirits of Slavic folklore. Looking at the flavor text on the rest of the cards in the rusalka cycle from the Guildpack expansion, it seems to me …

Reason #3,341: This card…

Let’s do it for…this guy. Man. Playing against this card is not a fun experience for me. Maybe adrift in time and space is a good place for Teferi to be. I’m sorry. Those were my feelings talking. I’m fine. To its credit, this card never got banned. It probably wouldn’t even make a top …

Reason #1,869: An imminent conflagration

I’m looking at a lot of overgrowth here, and I’m also looking at some fires that are really started to get going. This place is about to get torched. Do you think the Gruul know how to do a controlled burn? If they do, do you think they’d ever actually do one? In fact, I’m …

Reason #6,814: My favorite card.

This is my favorite card. Is it the best card in Magic? No. Is it a great way to close out a game? You betcha! I’ve been running a mono-black deck lately in Historic on Arena. It’s sort of a devotion-style deck, but I don’t lean hard into Gary–think I’m running just two–and I have …

Reason 6,662: Magic the Gathering – Where teeth come to die.

Seems like having teeth around here can be pretty rough. I sure hope this guy has some Novocaine, though I can’t say I’m optimistic. Just looking at things here, I’m guessing the dental services in his area aren’t the best.

Reason #881: Kefnet’s back.

The god-eternals were really unbalanced in limited formats. And while I’m no design expert, I think it would have done a lot of good if they had just taken out the part about being put into exile. That’s kind of what the introduction of the exile zone was for: so the there was a place …

Reason #871: The reason I don’t want to visit Amonkhet

One reason among many really. But yes. This is the so-called god-pharaoh, that guy who built the dreadhorde and used all those zombies to invade Ravnica. Real nice fellow, eh? I’ll just take a hard pass on this Nicol Bolas. Hard pass on Amonkhet. Hard pass on Ravnica. Hard pass on this whole stupid multiverse.