Reason #3,971: His blood is on fire

Why is this person’s blood on fire? I mean, crud, that looks like lava or something. So this Purphoros, he’s a god of the plane of Theros. As a side-note, the ‘gods’ of the MTG Multiverse typically aren’t planeswalkers. What does that tell you about the quality of ‘gods’ in the MTG Multiverse? Weaker than …

Reason #4,887: Doubt. No benefit. Not apologizing.

I admit, any indictments I made of this guy at the moment might well be unfounded. Maybe this guy is a legitimate businessman, who acquired his product legally and humanely, and he’s filling a valuable niche in the Innistrad economy. But ya know what, MTG Multiverse? You lost the benefit of the doubt with me …

Reason #8,009: Build a moat

Why do I need a moat, Syr Branigan? Not that I doubt your advice. Far from it. I just want to know exactly what we’re up against. This is the MTG Multiverse, after all. I mean, how big is this thing? And why are its eyes on fire? Should I build my own moat, or …

Reason #3,655: You’ve been cleansed

Imagine you live on a plane. You and all sorts of other people. Elves. Robots. Giants slugs. One day, out of nowhere, your plane gets CLEANSED. Are the all caps there excessive? Admittedly I feel a little silly using them for emphasis, but look at that picture. I don’t know where all those people are …

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