That line about things perishing twice, was that a prediction? Was that something you lived through, Robert Frost? Were you a planeswalker? Now I have questions.
Tag Archives: planeswalker
Reason #3,770: There goes the sun.
They blot out the sun. For five days. And they yell the entire time. I gotta ask: why in the world did Nicol Bolas want to conquer this plane? This place is stupid. Why would anyone want to live here? Ravnica is stupid! Nicol Bolas is stupid! This whole stupid multiverse is stupid! … I’m …
Reason #7,731: Regression
Let me get this straight. We’re worshiping angels now? You do realize that’s a step DOWN from gods, right? And just to remind you, the gods around here are pretty terrible. Also, they’re weak; they can’t planeswalk. And you’re telling me that you want to worship something LOWER in the order of creation. Were the …
Reason #3,378: I feel like Dovin should know better.
Come on, dude. You live in the MTG Multiverse; you’re even a planeswalker. Why are you surprised that there are giant monsters everywhere? A civilized plane? Oh, please. This is Ravnica. Go check out the sewers.
Reason #662: Change is not always a good thing.
I’m looking at the rules text of this card, and I have a very important question. Does this mean that if I met Ashaya in person, I would become a tree? Because I don’t want to be a tree. Thanks. Ashaya can’t planeswalk, right?
Reason #880: Bontu’s back.
Here she is. And she’s a zombie. Just makin’ a mess of Ravnica. The so-called ‘gods’ of the MTG Multiverse don’t impress me much. It often seems like the planeswalkers are actually more powerful, than say the gods of Amonkhet or Theros or wherever. Case in point, Bolas killing and enslaving the Amonkhet gods. Also, …
Reason #2,951: Life among the planeswalkers
Mere mortals, living as ants in the shadows of giants.
Reason #6,629: The thief of crowns
Meet Oko. On Magic’s digital platform, MTG Arena, whenever Oko creates a food token, he says, “It’s not poisoned. Trust me.” Hold on, Oko. Who said anything about poison? I didn’t say anything about poison. Why are we talking about poison, Oko? Should I be concerned? SHOULD I BE CONCERNED?
Reason #3,971: His blood is on fire
Why is this person’s blood on fire? I mean, crud, that looks like lava or something. So this Purphoros, he’s a god of the plane of Theros. As a side-note, the ‘gods’ of the MTG Multiverse typically aren’t planeswalkers. What does that tell you about the quality of ‘gods’ in the MTG Multiverse? Weaker than …
Reason #8,009: Build a moat
Why do I need a moat, Syr Branigan? Not that I doubt your advice. Far from it. I just want to know exactly what we’re up against. This is the MTG Multiverse, after all. I mean, how big is this thing? And why are its eyes on fire? Should I build my own moat, or …
10,000 Reasons Why the MTG Multiverse is a Terrible Place to Live 